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  • Writer's pictureG Weisbrodt

I Am Woman, I Always Shave

Introduction

"I Am Woman, I Always Shave" is a hilarious and empowering epic poem that delves into the daily ritual of shaving from a woman's perspective. Through vivid imagery, playful language, and a rhythmic flow, the poem transforms the mundane act of shaving into a heroic and humorous adventure. Each stanza captures the resilience and determination required to maintain smooth skin, while also celebrating the strength and ingenuity of women. With relatable anecdotes and a consistent, confident tone, this poem is a joyous and uplifting ode to the everyday battles women face and conquer with grace and humor. Prepare to laugh, nod in agreement, and feel a sense of camaraderie as you journey through the trials and triumphs of personal grooming in "I Am Woman, I Always Shave."



Analysis


The poem’s strength lies in its ability to blend humor with relatability. It begins by setting a lighthearted tone, comparing the act of shaving to a magical and heroic endeavor. This whimsical approach instantly engages the reader, inviting them to laugh along with the poet at the absurdity and universality of the experience.


Structure and Form: The poem employs a regular rhyme scheme and rhythm, which enhances its playful nature and makes it easy to read aloud. This musicality contributes to the overall comedic effect, turning everyday struggles into a form of lyrical storytelling.


Imagery and Metaphor: The use of vivid imagery, such as “The ankle, the knee, the thigh’s soft curve” and “The armpit tango, the bikini line dance,” creates a dynamic and visual representation of the shaving process. Metaphors like “wield my razor like a magic wand” and “I conquer the hair, like a magical spell” elevate the act of shaving to an almost mythical status, adding to the humor and charm.


Themes: Central themes of the poem include resilience, self-care, and the shared experience of womanhood. The poem humorously acknowledges the effort and occasional mishaps involved in personal grooming while celebrating the determination and ingenuity of women. It also touches on themes of self-acceptance and confidence, as the protagonist faces each challenge with humor and grace.


Tone and Mood: The tone of the poem is light-hearted and whimsical, with a hint of satire. The mood is celebratory, empowering, and amusing, encouraging readers to find joy and laughter in their daily routines.



In summary, "I Am Woman, I Always Shave" is an entertaining and uplifting poem that humorously captures the universal experience of personal grooming. It celebrates the strength, creativity, and humor of women, turning an everyday task into a delightful and epic tale.


I Am Woman, I Always Shave

In the mirror's gleam, at the break of dawn,

I wield my razor like a magic wand.

With foam and blade, I bravely face,

The stubble and fuzz on my glorious face.


Oh, the battles I fight in my own little war,

Against the hair that sprouts, forevermore.

From chin to lip, no place is safe,

For I am woman, and I always shave.


In the shower's steam, with a leg raised high,

I reach for the stars, or at least I try.

The smoothness I seek is a noble quest,

In the war against hair, I give my best.


The ankle, the knee, the thigh’s soft curve,

No follicle survives my steely nerve.

I slip and slide, but I’m undeterred,

For I am woman, and I shave undisturbed.


I’ve shaved in a hurry, I’ve shaved in the car,

I’ve shaved on the bus, and once in a bar.

With electric or blade, cream or gel,

I conquer the hair, like a magical spell.


The armpit tango, the bikini line dance,

I perform these moves with skill and chance.

In public restrooms, I take my stand,

For I am woman, with razor in hand.


But oh, the nicks, the cuts, the burns,

The lessons in shaving one always learns.

A band-aid here, a little blood there,

The cost of waging this follicle warfare.


And yet, I laugh at each mishap,

For a smooth, hairless skin is my victory lap.

I face the day with confidence bold,

For I am woman, in control.


The hair may grow, but I’m prepared,

With razors, creams, and a heart that’s dared.

To conquer each strand, with every shave,

In the battle of beauty, I am brave.


So here’s to the women, who face this fight,

With razors sharp and spirits bright.

We shave, we wax, we pluck with grace,

For smoothness is our endless chase.


With humor and strength, we take the stage,

In this epic tale of our daily engage.

For I am woman, hear me rave,

I laugh, I live, and I always shave.

 

Five Reviews

Literary Laughs:

"I Am Woman, I Always Shave" is a delightful romp through the daily rituals of personal grooming. The poem's humor and vivid imagery turn the mundane into a heroic adventure, celebrating the resilience and creativity of women everywhere. A must-read for anyone who enjoys a good laugh and a touch of poetic whimsy."


Humor with Heart:

"This poem is both hilarious and heartwarming, capturing the often overlooked trials of shaving with a playful, lyrical style. The humor is spot-on, and the underlying message of resilience and self-acceptance is empowering. 'I Am Woman, I Always Shave' is a joyous read that will leave you smiling and nodding in agreement."


Whimsical and Relatable:

"With its clever rhymes and whimsical metaphors, 'I Am Woman, I Always Shave' transforms an everyday chore into a grand, comical narrative. The poem resonates with anyone who has faced the trials of grooming, making it both relatable and laugh-out-loud funny. A truly enjoyable piece of poetry."


A Celebration of Womanhood:

"This epic poem is a celebration of the daily battles women face with humor and grace. The playful language and rhythmic flow make it a joy to read, while the underlying themes of resilience and confidence shine through. 'I Am Woman, I Always Shave' is a testament to the strength and ingenuity of women everywhere."


Lyrical Comedy:

"Combining lyrical beauty with sharp wit, 'I Am Woman, I Always Shave' is a comedic masterpiece. The poem's vivid descriptions and humorous take on the act of shaving make it a standout piece. It's a reminder to laugh at life's little challenges and embrace our everyday victories with a smile."


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